WAR IS PEACE
FREEDOM IS SLAVERY
IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH
However, what if it that 1st woman President is .... Condoleeza Rice??????
How do we handle that? She a member of 2 oppressed classes (female and african-american). But her politics make her an enemy of progressive peoples and she is a stooge for the great class enemy, GWB! And yet: Она хорошо говорит по-русски.
As a Zampolit (Political Officer) I seek guidance from the party in the event of such a disaster! I must know the Party's exact stance on such a conundrum before I go out to brief our troops!!!
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev
Please forgive me for my rather harsh condemnation of your alleged question asking - I simply did not know that you were a loyal citizen of NOVA! My goodness; I shame myself for throwing the book at you while foaming revolutionary zeal around the mouth! Shame on me, shame! Oh please forgive me, Comrade Blokhayvek - I beg of you!!!
Speaking of FairTax Virginia... I believe you are within earshot of resident Troll Mulva Goldbook (who's blog of socialist fervor can be found at nitwitplanet.blogspot.com). Mulva is a long time enemy of The People and his Nitwit Nation has long been violating The People's sensibilities. Please take time to read The People's History here on the Cube to learn more about this blood thirsty weak liberal who DENIED a cancer victim a few dollars (while preaching Socialized Healthcare to the rest of us). Why, Mulva was simply to broke after buying delicious Lattes and Panera Bread to worry about his fellow man.... therefore we must be TAXED to pay for Mulva's lack of charity... or humanity for that matter.
Glory to Tim Kaine's eye-brow of Social Justice!
-- Chairman Meowsevich S. Punchenko
There is no need to beg! All is forgiven of a brother revolutionary. Just don't try that with Laika the Space Dog! Me thinks it would be ugly. Yes... ugly indeed!
I have briefly read over the writings of this enemy of the People ™, Mulva Goldbook. Goldbook... the very name sounds bourgeois. And clearly denying a cancer victim is counter-revolutionary and will not be tolerated by the proletariat. I'll bet Ghoulbook is also a Global Warming Denier too!!! Not to worry, The Party has ways to deal with heretics like this! I wonder if they have ever heard the words "To the the wall!!!" shouted at them.
Yes! Comrade Gov. Kaine is an example for progressive peoples everywhere!
Yours in Socialist Tyranny,
Zampolit B. S. Blokhayev
By the way, I have this really cool collection of flannel shirts, though I'm avoiding getting the color that Mrs. John Edwards is currently wearing...don't want to set her off.
As you have been away for a couple months, you may not be aware of the incident involving the theft of the SUV and running down, death and grave disfigurement of the future (valuable) necro-proxies that occured recently in the Socialist State of Kalifornia. It was only by the quick thinking of Dr. P contacting Pointy Red, our ProgHedgeHog and procurer of magikal flying equipment, that we were able to whisk Meow (in a complete state of fugue and utterly unable to function), Dr. P (firing at the CHiPs as he retreated up the steps of the Tupolev Tu-154-B), and Dr. P's 'Good Time Girls' Flight Crew back to the bunker and to relative safety. I thank Stalin every day that the Red Pointy One achieved such genius in laying hands on the Tupolev... without it, we would surely have lost both Meow and Dr. P... The result being that is was recognized that Meow had developed a severe Hot Pocket problem and when we finally got him stripped down and ready for his bath, we discovered that he'd taken to soaking all his undergarments in spicy seafood sauce before donning them (which would account for much, including the GTGFC complaints about burning when they peed... we thought they'd all just picked up another... well... never mind)...
In any case, as you can imagine, it has taken much work on our part to try to help Meow back to himself... large mounds of $oft Ca$h for him to smell and frolic in, as well as many pornoraphic films and sometimes, just absolute quiet... so, if you find him slightly changed, that is why. If we had recognized his 'problem' sooner, we might have saved a great deal of trouble, a international diplomatic incident, two of the Good Time Girls Flight Crew who defected in Kalifornia (WHORES!... Slatterns! HARLOTS!! as if you could do better than Dr. P!!!), and a great deal of taxidermy work for me to get the Johnsons up to necroproxie standard (though Meow has taken to spending a great deal of time with them by the fire, just chatting quietly, which we take as a good sign - both for his well-being and for the quality of my work, if I may say so myself)...
So... Please... go easy on him. He will be back to himself in no time, but he is still in a slightly delicate state... If he has his bouts of begging, we just let him get it out of his system. He really is doing much better than when we first got him out... he was catatonic and didn't talk for literally minutes at a time... <shuddering>... I really did fear we'd lost him...
Here's you free vodka... lucky... something.
In the meantime, security cameras at the Party headquarters recorded the following image from last night's celebration. Don't ask.
My eyes! My poor delicate sensitive eyes! What have you done to me?!? I cannot see anymore, I can't live after seeing something like that!
SO DON'T ANY OF YOU DARE TO EVEN THINK WHAT I KNOW YOU'RE ALL THINKING AND DYING TO POST!!!
I have a shovel and I'm not afraid to use it for anything other than its intended purpose.
She's probably one of the Chairman's girls.
And Betty, because you went neener neener neener, you get no beet muffins, no beet cookies, and no beet reddies!
Equal vodka for all genders!!!
NOW GIVE ME MY VODKA!!!
Zampolit Blokhayev, you are a hate-filled parasite because you want to impose freedom down the Socialist world's throat!