Opiate of the People
NO MASS JUSTICE, NO PLANETARY PEACE!
TAX THE MASS-RICH!
"Sooner or later, you have enough mass." - Barack Obama
"No planet gets massive on its own!" - Elizabeth Warren
"Hey, I'm not massive. I'm for equal distribution of mass." - Micheal Moore
Comrades, the solar system is unfair! Why do some planets, like Jupiter, have so much mass and others, like Mercury, have so little? Is it because Mercury is mostly black? Join the #OCCUPY JUPITER movement and demand a more equal solar system!
Ivan the Stakhanovets
Not just mass, but MOONS as well! Jupiter exploits other planets by opulently displaying more and bigger moons. Such flashes of inequality can be seen with the naked eye. This cannot go unobserved any longer. It's absolutely indecent!
The People's Little Pony
We should have the Sun redistribute the mass equally. Come to think of it, our sun is quite small compared to the other stars in the galaxy. The black hole in the middle should redistribute celestial mass as well. But our black hole isn't equal to all the other black holes either! We have to occupy the entire universe! But how can we be sure our universe is equal to all the other universes? We have to occupy the entire multiverse! BUT WAIT! WHAT ABOUT OTHER DIMENSIONS?! Comrades, we have a lot of occupying to do.
I'm really proud of the work our General Secretary Alisa Seleznyova has been doing in relocating capitalist pigs to Jupiter and be put to use in works camps of some sort.
Ivan the Stakhanovets
I denounce all racist astronomy discussion! Such discussing involves black holes, red planets, yellow dwarfs and so forth. I find such talking exclusionary and marginalizes the rest of the universe. I am offended.<spit>
Meanwhile, Back at the Revolucion, is Bonnie Fwank "heading" Occupy Uranus? There could be quite the "movement" that I want no part of.
Shovel 4 U
You have outdone yourself !
Glory to The Party for your visualization of the infinity that is liberal socialism.
As for you, help your self to another beet... or even an onion, for your efforts.
Today, Uranus. Tomorrow, the Galaxy!
Make the gas giants pay their fair share!
I know I beat "Michael Moore is fat" jokes a little too much, but if we are redistributed gravity, wouldn't he alone provide a little too much?