The Socialist Brain of a Liberal Democrat

As promised in the previous post, , we have prepared a composite sketch of a healthy Socialist brain.

Naturally it took twice as much time to map it because the brain of a progressive, open-minded Democrat is always changing - as opposed to the rigid and bigoted Republican brain.



Now in our store: http://13695.spreadshirt.com/brain-of-a ... -I10448608


See the definition of Liberalism in the :

A normal state of a healthy person whose brain developed under the caring guidance of the progressive establishment.

As opposed to the rigid and bigoted Republican / Capitalist / Conservative brain, a Liberal / Socialist / Democrat brain is hard to map because it undergoes perpetual reshuffling of its centers and synapses. Generally it can be characterized by a compassionate concern for not taxing the rich enough, combined with generosity in spending other people's money.

A liberal brain is known to have a well-developed "blame-America" synapse, a benign "Smarter Than Thou" tumor, a Global Warming Panic Center, the Entitlement Synapse, Moral Relativity Gray Area, and a "P.C. Lobe" responsible for speech codes, multiculturalism, racial quotas, and alternative lifestyles. The underdeveloped areas of a Liberal Brain usually include those that handle common sense, personal responsibility, sense of humor, patriotism, and work ethics.

The eternal motivational force that keeps a liberal going is typically a daily doze of Starbucks coffee combined with the dialectical struggle of the opposites - the feeling of being a victim of oppression and the feeling of guilt for oppressing the others at the same time.
 

My embedded G-think microchip just downloaded the following message:

Behold the pinnacle of cerebral evolution that is the Socialist Brain! ...^!%## Raise taxes on the capitalist exploiters; bled the class enemy dry... *(%&+= ...Oh my mythological deity, global warming is causing an ice age; we're doomed... </%$* ...Bush lied, Bush spied, people died and cried... Help, Che, help!

Sorry about that glitch. At any rate, my "American" free radical has found a hyphened word to attach to and it's "anti-".
 

Hey maaan?
Where's the gratuituous sex, drugs, rock-n-roll brain lobes maaan?
Wm.J.C. didn't use it all up yet.
 

A medical triumph of which even Lysenko would be proud! Not since reading Lamarck and the original Greek phrenology texts have I been so enamoured of a scientific achievement!

Certainly our research can not end with this crude diagram! We must complete the multi-cultural arm of the study, in which ethnic considerations are properly taken into consideration. For instance, certain studies have shown that particular victim groups have a much larger victim lobe, which eradicates the guilt lobe. In particular, transgendered American Indians have no guilt lobes of any sort, and enormous victim lobes as well as an enormous entitlement hemisphere. The NIH will most certainly begin funding our research again once Hillary is in charge.
 

I was expecting a diagram that looked more like a black hole that not even light could escape, but instead projected stupid concentrate out of it.
 

 

And after all this time, I thought the socialist brain was a product of sniffing too much glue and getting a hollow noggin. Now I know that they are born this way and "dont know any better". I am also further enlightened as to why they use that excuse for their collective perspective on life, love and the revolution!
 

Hmmm...this brain seems to be incomplete. Where is the "Gay Cowboy" lobe of the brain?

Regards,

Che Guevara
Burning in Hell
 

I hope their phrenologists get paid by the bump...
 

This is fantastic.
 

Comrades,
As the Commissar of Education, I shall make sure that all of this vital health information is published in the Medical and Psychology textbooks that are being published at this time. Thank you for your contribution! The People will most certainly benefit out of it.

Updated textbooks,
Vladimir Ivanov
Marxton, District of Commissars
 

How about the Kennedy Lust tumor.... we must all aspire to be like a Kennedy.

Missing the glory days of camelot,
Chairman Meow.
 

All you missed was the neural connection to its feminine side.
 

Will this be available on T-shirts?
 

Yep!

https://www.spreadshirt.com/shop.php?op ... _id=538292
 

 

 

Brothers and sisters of the Great Revolution we have found another useful idiot:



Disturbed anti-war protester can't find soldier, kills civilian with axe instead


In Dutch: 'He hates soldiers, and says that the army kills people, so it would be legitimate if he were also to kill someone...'

AMSTERDAM, Netherlands (AP) - A U.S. citizen has confessed to using an axe to kill a Dutch student after failing to find a soldier to attack, his lawyer said Tuesday.

The suspect, Carlos Hartmann, 41, of Tecumseh, Mich., has confessed to the Sept. 8 killing on a train platform in the southern city of Roosendaal, defence lawyer Peter Gremmen said.

Gremmen said Hartmann wanted to punish the Netherlands for its support of the war in Iraq.

Hartmann appeared before a judge Tuesday and was ordered held for another two weeks for investigation.

"He hates soldiers, and says that the army kills people, so it would be legitimate if he were also to kill someone . . . from the American military - or from its NATO allies," Gremmen said in a telephone interview.

When he failed to find a soldier at the Roosendaal train station, "he got such a crazy, disturbed idea that he killed a civilian," Gremmen said.

Hartmann did not attempt to escape and was arrested shortly after the killing.

Dutch prosecutors confirmed that the suspect had confessed but did not identify him or his victim, in keeping with Dutch practice.

Under the Dutch legal system, Hartmann was not required to enter a plea Tuesday.

Prosecution spokeswoman Martine Pilaar said her office was taken aback by the defence lawyer's willingness to disclose details of his case.

But Gremmen said he was only confirming details published by the local newspaper BN/De Stem. The paper's source was not named, and police declined to comment.

"I was also surprised when I saw the paper; I thought, this must be coming from the investigation," the lawyer said.

Gremmen said Hartmann has lived in the Netherlands since 2002, supporting himself with English editing work for a Japanese company, which he could do by computer, and that he had no fixed address.

He said Hartmann had consented to undergo psychological testing, and was now "terribly sorry for his deed."

The victim, identified as Thijs Geers, was waiting for a train and had no connection with the suspect or the military. Online condolence registers in the Netherlands were flooded with messages of sympathy for him and his family.

BN/De Stem quoted a witness who asked to remain anonymous as describing Hartmann as striking the victim in the back of the head with the axe. It also quoted an unidentified family member from the United States as saying Hartmann has suffered from emotional problems since his early 20s.

"It's a sad story," Gremmen said. "But I'm glad he's admitted what he's done and that he's sorry for it."


The Canadian Press, 2007
 

 

It would be equally valid to take that study and the conclusions in the article that've been extrapolated by the scientists, use it as part of a new study, and conclude that the study as a whole proves that Liberals do not know a logical fallacy when they see it. Actually, that goes for the entire modern-day Democratic party.
 

I would have sworn I had all the "W" keys removed.
This study wasn't conducted in the White House was it?
 

 

 

...And she got it wrong in her headline. The Sense of Humor Cell is embedded in the Smarter Than Thou Tumor and is not connected to the Work Ethic Molecule.
 

 

Comrade Square,

There is no collective processing complex visible, and there must be a large Marx infatuation zone, next to the dialectical pass through zone.

There might need to be a copy of the other side of the brain so all the heretofor unknown areas could be collectively identified.This is only half a brain does it go with half fast?
 

Comrades,

One can assume from this study one of the groups has brain waves and the other does not.

Guessing both is only half right.
 

Notice how in the comments someone said "Nobody can claim ownership that I know of, and I've seen variations of it. I think it is a group project that evolved over time into its present form. People's Cube is given credit."

It was indeed an evolving group project, but it was the People's Cube group project that I initiated. The main contributors were Laika and especially Professor Palimpsest, with some later additions from Will Beria.

Sometimes I wonder why it is so hard to give a proper attribution, especially that Google makes it so easy. I guess the answer is in the word "folklore" and the mentality surrounding it. Once a piece becomes a folklore item, attributing it to a particular living person reduces its power and diminishes its legendary aura.

Who can object to the ownership of the People™?


 

A Brain By, For, and of The People™. What could be finer... now please dispense all brains to your local Party approved organ depository.
 

Comerades...
The liberal brain drawn above is fairly accurate. The people's liberal brain is drawn to scale and the brain shown is the actual size of the average liberal-brain. The party heartily approves of the size because it equal to the output of original thinking that the party discourages. The smaller brain and eventually, smaller cranium makes people more compact and pliable. There will be more room and more food availabe for the leading proliteriate.
If you have noticed, most liberal party members already sport the smaller head and thinner neck of latest style of party member. Look at the dear leader himself. He too has a small head, sloped forehead, large ears (for hearing the voice of the true leadership) and the pencil-like neck of the new socialist man.
A smaller brain means a smaller head. A smaller head means a thinner neck needed to hold it up. A thinner neck means less food eaten and less blood feeding the smaller brain. It is a win-win situation for party leadership.
 

 

Comrades,

This is the puckey of horses!

Also in the DNA band they will find predispositions to: robbery, murder, car theft, safe cracking, making computer viruses, parking illegally, speeding, taking mobile phones, selling defense secrets, and trying to dominate peaceful collectives

Where will it end?
 

Another usage of the Cube image from the Telegraph:




 

There is now a German translation of our Socialist Brain map, dated circa 2014.

It has been discovered and promptly reported by Genosse Dummkopf, who has fished it out of the bowels of the German interwebs (posted and ).

I'm told this map is also currently being translated into Polish.


 

So the scarecrow was a conservative simply because he didn't have a brain?