Al Gore's Oscar/Nobel Acceptance Speech (Draft)

 

I guess that Idiot and Progressive Activist are pretty synonymous.
 

It is terribly unfair to assign such malevolent motives to Chairman AlGore.

Our cultural superiors have all been telling us that AlGore is a near-deity at this point, and given the unprecedented freeze in the eastern US, he will soon be photographed walking on (frozen) water, right before he transforms it into a biofuel. Even the People's Media acknowledges that there is no question that everything AlGore says is true. Who are we to question this assembly of such stupefying superiority?

Really, I hope the Chairman has stocked up on People's Spam for the anticipated standing-room-only influx at the People's Treatment Center. These unpatriotic skeptics need re-education - STAT!!!

Thankfully, millions of American children have already been indoctrinated in Gore-ology, so it's only the adult agitators that we'll need to deal with.
 

I hope Mr. Gore also details the importance of not employing any college professors or kindergarten teachers who deny the Four Truths of Warming. Naturally the People's Education System has already been purged of such non-individuals, but Mr. Gore should be pushing for legislation to keep these disgusting corporate shills out of all schools worldwide, regardless of ownership.
 

Global Warming Beach Party



from
 

What the hell is going on down at the bottom of that image?
 

If someone wanted to condense the history of our age (as portrayed by the media) into one image, one could not think of anything more complete than this one. Good find, Margaret! Is this what you call retro-cool?
 

Thats my Uncle Jasper in the pink leotard......... he is voting Democrat now, fishing accident got him.... which was caused by , of course! All death and calamity is caused by Global Warming! Why is everyone looking at me funny?
 

 

 

What looks like Bea Arthur appears to be Sean Penn re-enacting his glorious feat of New Orleans. Which doesn't mean he couldn't appear as her at the Country Buffet in Reno or at your Uncle Jasper's pad in the dead of night with Mad Albright in her tighty-whities. He's just such a progressive man, Sean is. It's a way of life for him. He's always there when he's needed. Wait, someone's knowcking on the door...
 

I loved Sean in his portrayal of former Governor Clinton in All the King's Men
 

 

Pardon my confusion, but isn't Komrad Gore planning a concert that will solve all global warming problems? Remember years ago when there used to be hunger in Africa? Concert; problem solved. Maybe it would be better for the party to focus on Bush/Halliburton, and how they are standing in the way of having the appropiraite problem-solving concerts? I think...
Oh never mind, I see the problem now. I was trying to think. Whew, that was a close one. Gore/Franken 08!
 

Doomsday is upon us! Its going to be 63 degrees tommorow in The People's Commonwealth and I'm afraid all is lost!

Quickly, someone get Dr. Strangelove on line-two, we might have to go underground until Global Warming goes away... or until Amerika becomes a socialist utopia like the DPRK... whatever comes first.
 

 

Well he sure does deserve it.
 

 

I agree comrade Branish! Just the other day I dumped a People's cooler full of ice outside onto my plush manicured lawn....and today....well.... today it was gone! Poof! Evaporated into the icy blue skies all because of Global Warming! I nearly soiled myself, comrade Branish - I was overwhelmed in fear. Just imagine, in two days time the world will be as hot as the surface of the sun and no longer will we be able to keep our boxed wine cool! Just imagine!!! Oh the shame! The shame of it all! The shame!

We should've listened! We should've listened! Damn you Bushler! Damn you all to South Central L.A!!!!
 

 

What if Rush wins instead? Hah! I think this is so great because if Gore doesn't win, which he shouldn't, because he's a total flake, all he'll be able to say is, "Yeah, I was nominated the same year Rush Limbaugh was." You know he's gotta hate that. hee hee hee.




From Newsbusters:http://newsbusters.org/node/10552


Limbaugh Nominated For Nobel Peace Prize
Posted by Dan Riehl on February 1, 2007 - 16:19.

I am posting this as the mainstream media hasn't picked it up.

While not being able to keep up with all of his many accomplishments over the years, I do speak from personal experience when I say Rush Limbaugh's 1992 Best Seller The Way Things Ought To Be may have done more to carry discussion of conservative ideas and the concept of political freedom into elements of American popular culture where it was never thought much about before.

So it's good to see Mr. Limbaugh finally nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize:

LEESBURG, Va., Feb. 1 /PRNewswire-USNewswire/ -- Landmark Legal Foundation today nominated nationally syndicated radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh for the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize.

Limbaugh, whose daily radio show is heard by more than 20 million
people on more than 600 radio stations in the United States and around the
world, was nominated for the prestigious award for his "nearly two decades
of tireless efforts to promote liberty, equality and opportunity for all
humankind, regardless of race, creed, economic stratum or national origin.
These are the only real cornerstones of just and lasting peace throughout
the world," said Landmark President Mark R. Levin.

Unfortunately, this might not bode well for his career. In 1988 the Nobel Peace Prize went to the United Nations Peace Keepers, who went on to distinguish themselves as sex traffickers and under-aged skin traders of world renown.

As if those shoes aren't hard enough to fill, there's always the 1994 winner, terrorist Yasser Arafat - one of the few individuals to often meet privately with then President Bill Clinton without fear of staining his dress.

And who could forget 2001 winner Kofi Annan, or 2002's Jimmy Carter, both somehow allegedly long on being noble, questionable on anti-semitism, and extremely short on actually bringing peace to anywhere, certainly not Rwanda or Iran and the Middle-East, respectively.

With some thought, perhaps the real question is, were the honorable Mr. Limbaugh to ultimately win the prize, is it one he should even accept?

Though were he to put it on E-Bay, I suppose a fellow named Clinton could be counted on to run up the bids.

Oh, some guy named Al was nominated as well. Is he a plumber, or somethin
 

Very confusing... just caught a recap of Algore's speechifying in Toronto last night... He spoke at the University of Toronto at Convocation Hall which normally holds 1,500 but was 'expanded' to hold 2,000... 500 tickets were prereserved, so there were 1,500 tickets for sale for $20 each and there were 23,000 hits on the website and it crashed... thing sold out in 5 minutes and as of yesterday afternoon, they were scalping tickets for up to $500 each... I don't understand... He basically covered the same power point presentation that's the basis of An Inconvenient Truth... and the most reported thing that came out of it was his pronouncement that although he still believes the Canadian people capable of great leadership and making wise choices, he doesn't believe our leadership is capable in the same wise... so, apparently, we can make good choices regarding leadership, we just haven't? Maybe he misspoke, a la John Kerry, and he didn't MEAN to insult us... but man, what an arrogant f**k that guy is... he has just become so superior since he stopped being perceived as Al Bore and it was truly pathetic to see the Liberal and New Democratic Party psychophantic politicians, past and present, looking on adoringly (hey... they were in the shot), and every single one of them had given up their regular party's tie colour of choice in favour of green ties last night... it was like a bunch of teenage girls had all gotten together ahead of time to plan out what they were going to wear...

... and all of this kaka is leading into a Carbon Busters thing at the same venue tonight called A Convenient Truth (hey... they're nothing if not creative) which is essentially a cost/benefit analysis of reducing carbon emissions by changing how we live and the things we use in our homes (sorry Meow, but according to these guys, you shouldn't be so in love with your toaster.... Ahhh! I know!... the bastards!)... and they somehow come to the conclusion that we can reduce our carbon output from the home and our vehicles by 70% at a cost savings of around 54%... Now, I want everyone to listen carefully, in case you happen to catch anything on Sir Nicholas Stern's report on the economics of climate change or such-like, because between Stern and David Suzuki and a bunch of politicians in Australia (where they have just banned incandescent light bulbs so that people must use compact fluorescents... which for some reason I thought were less environmentally friendly once they die... harder to get rid or, or maybe I'm wrong) and Algore and Godo Stoyke who is the president of Carbon Buster - this European group that designs or redesigns things in an ecofriendly way - his second book, "The Carbon Buster's Home Energy Handbook" has just come out so he's touring on Algore's coattails to promote it... So... If you see or hear any of these guys, listen carefully for the word, "opportunity"... count how many times they say it, cause it's their new buzz word... in other words, the need to reduce carbon emissions and the technology necessary to do so is an economic "opportunity"... win/win... or so they're trying to tell us, but only if we rush into it headlong right now... wait... sorry... that was wrong... ... rush into it headlong RIGHT NOW OR WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE, BUT NOT BEFORE SOME SWEDISH IDIOT GIVES ALGORE THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE (why the peace prize... why not one of the other ones?)...

So... I'm confused... I know Algore invented the interweb or the information superfreeway or whatever it's called, and he probably coined the terms "" or "" and he was the "next president of the United States" and he's married to Tipper (who, by the way, must have enough crap in her hair to shelac a pinata and isn't that stuff all full of environmentally unfriendly solvents?)... But I had no idea your ex-veep was a rock star too...

By the way... he showed up at his lecture last night... sorry... not his lecture... it was, apparently, a panel discussion, but I think they completely forgot about the other nine people... in a big old gas guzzling limo... apparently, the Prius was in the shop...
 

 

This was sent this morning by the guy who does http://www.politicalxray.com

Al Gore drives "GoreMobile" to Global Warming Concert celebrating nominations for Nobel Prize, Academy Award and Honorary Climatology Degree for "An Inconvenient Truth" fueling "Draft Gore" for 2008.


 

Heed the Goracle, comrades! Since Christianity has become passe and nobody wants to be a Muslim because there goes your vodka, environmentalism is the only suitable opium of the People. Comrade Gore is the new prophet, a William Jennings Bryan for our time. Ironic, isn't it?
 

 

 

Have you noticed that Disneyworld's Animatronics haven't been taking any quantum leaps forward lately? Do you suppose that Algore's handlers have bought them off lest he appear at a disadvantage to something puffing air and creaking and looking like it has a steel rod up its ass?

How confusing. Life imitates art. And I'm not sure which is which.
 

The thing I find most heartening and uplifting about the environmental movement and global warming has to do with the proposed solutions. The methodology is very telling and is a wonderful demostration of how far we, as Socialists, have come to dominating what were once free societies. There used to be a saying that summed up what I mean very neatly, that saying was "You can't do that, this is free country." By that it was meant you can't use the government to force other people to do things - basically, you can't establish tyranny.

Now take environmentalism. In a free country you wouldn't be able to violate the freedom and liberty of other people by forcing them to use certain light bulbs or do or not do things with the property they own or any number of things that've happened or are on the drawing boards of legislation. What you can do in a free country is state what you believe in order to convince other people of the soundness of your belief. Then they will make free choices as to what they will do. You'll notice that no one in this day and age even considers that by using the government to force what they believe on the rest of society, the best example being environmentalism, they establish precident that violates every tenate of freedom and liberty. They turn the role of government as a means of protecting freedom and liberty, the American experiment, on it's head.

Whereas a century ago the phrase "You can't do that, this is a free country," an expression stated proudly by free men, should now be worded by all of us Left Wing activists as "You can't do that, this isn't a free country." (Heavy accent on the "isn't.") This is a phrase you can proudly spit in the face of evil because freedom and bourgeois notions of liberty are dangerous to the environment, the Planet, and society as a whole.

There are all sorts of things you can't do anymore. The precident of tyranny has been well established and no one even identifies it as such. This development of regarding tyranny as a social good and not even entertaining what the worn notions of how to preserve freedom is good news for all of us that believe in Socialism and the dictatorship of the People. Very few people even desire a free country anymore! Times have changed.

Nowadays when I see a smoker or someone that isn't recycling his empty bottle but is just tossing it into the garbage or any number of crimes being commited against the People and the Planet I get right up in that criminal's face and shout: "Hey asshole, you can't do that! This isn't a free country, you know!" And I say it isn't a free country proudly. It's taken us decades to wipe the idea of what a free country is out of the minds of Americans and to turn the notion of freedom into an epithet of criminality.

The next time you read an editorial or hear someone speak of solutions to environmental problems notice that they never entertain the methodology of freedom in their solutions,. They never say, I believe this is a problem but I also believe in human freedom so I simply want to convince your minds and allow you to make choices as free people, as is your birthright. They never simply want to convince your mind and let you voluntarily choose a free, independent course of action befitting a free person; they choose tyranny. They choose using the force of government to make you do what they think is right. That's because freedom is dangerous and you can't be trusted with it. That's because "this isn't a free country, you can't do that."

Be proud of that fact. Freedom would kill us all. That's why there's tyranny. Great civilizations have been built on tyranny. People like Al Gore understand this.
 

Note that all proposed remedies are the most expensive and difficult ones possible, and here is another key point--that third-world countries, who pollute much more, are oddly exempt. For there is no glory in rulling over poor and weak people. The dollar is a fungible unit of power. That's utter genius.

And here's another telling thing. The scare-mongers, until very recently, said that greenhouse gases "may contribute to global warming." And that "may" is sufficient to take action. Now they take it as a granted. See the Rand quote at the bottom of every page of the Cube.

The brew of viciousness, bossiness and the hysteria of the weak minded is toxic. I'd be a royalist and believe in a benevolent dictator had not history shown that his son would likely be worse, and if the palace intrigues wouldn't, at last, overpower even the best of them.

Fisher Ames may have been right in calling Jefferson an optimist, saying that it was a fool's game to think that people could put noble ideals above self interest. And don't people in wars fight for their comrades? It may be how we're so constituted. The genius of the founding fathers was to know human nature as well as they did, but bear in mind they came before the Prometheus of mind control, Karl Marx.

How much simpler it was to see the sword in the murderer's hand and to know that here is danger because it's immanent. In a world when most people cannot remember what they had for supper last night, can we expect people to make plans long range enough, out of reason, which needs thinking, which is painful and to be avoided for it takes away from entertainment?

He who has the best propaganda rules the world. And for that reason I, although an atheist, am perfectly willing to bow my head at a Christian prayer, knowing that the values are in general ones that I like.

But don't let me near a Jesuit. One of my hobbies is insulting them, and on the Georgetown campus yet.
 

Oooh... didja watch the Oscars... everyone who won anything for an Inconvenient Truth had to thank Algore for drawing their attention to 'the issue', which all said wasn't partisan... neither red nor blue but green (as in ad nauseum, maybe?)... to the point where the producers made the mistake of dragging him up on stage for their acceptance speech and he hijacked the producers' speech and got in the last word... I don't even think he realized that it wasn't his speech to make - that (aaaaahhhh... Gawd... I just looked to the right and there's this frightening picture of Helen Thomas... now I'm gonna have nightmares... F**K!... sorry)... anyway, it didn't even occur to him to just shut up and smile and let the producers accept their award... he had to jabber... and Tipper's hair looks as plastic as ever... really... she's got to have more petroleum products in there than a can of aerosol cheese... it's just freaky...

... anyway... it was really annoying... he was really annoying... and he got to give his acceptance speech even though he didn't win... what an annoying man...

At least The Departed won Best Director and Best Picture.... I had a feeling when they had Spielberg, Lucas and Coppola come out to announce Best Director...
 

Annoying AND stupid. The left jabbers about W being an idiot but Gore flunked out of Law school and dropped out of Divinity school or the other way around--how do you flunk god? Now I can see god flunking him, and I tend to be pro-life but would make an exception in his case. And I'm told that the French import aborted fetusus for cosmetics. Can you imagine what French women would look like with their faces adorned with warpaint made of Gore? Edith Piaf, dead lo these many years, would rise from her coffin, laughing, and peel the paint a mile away.

And in GPAs Gore did worse too.

Let's not forget their daughter Karena, I think it is. Tipper wanted to name her after the Russian book because she'd wept a tear seeing a train rushing on, but couldn't spell it. That's as funny as Oprah being a misspelling of Orpha, the Biblical name her aunt was supposed to give her.

Did you see the convention in which Algore was blethering on about how bad he fewlt about his son's being run over? It was child abuse. More child abuse than being a child of Algore.
 

Wait... so their daughter was supposed to be named Karenina? Isn't that Tolstoy's character's last name in the eponymous novel?

As for his son's accident and his referencing it as he has, I don't think of it as child abuse so much as exploitation... and not child exploitation, but simply cynical emotional political exploitation... oddly, someone sent me a link to this article last week, called , which does sort of sum it up...
 

 

Yes, SMO, the girl was supposed to be named Karenina.

I consider it child abuse because although it certainly all of what you said, I saw him fondle the child on camera, as genuine as his deep-mouth kiss of Tipper, and point at the child, who looked acutely uncomfortable. A child with a problem. Being held up as an object of pity to the world for serve his father's ambitions. Turning anyone into a victim whore is child abuse.

Tipper was also on the board, possibly head of it, which wanted to put ratings on (then) LPs which might have unsuitable lyrics. She had Frank Zappa on to testify, showing just how truly dim she is.

"Lady, the name of the group is Black Sabbath. What do you think is going to be inside?"

But to her credit, evidently once she saw the cut of our Many Titted Empress' jib, she wanted nothing to do with her. Algore and Our Empress were very politically close. Algore once upbraided one of his children and pointed to the security detail guarding his life and said, "Do you want to grow up and be like those?" (This from emails from Secret Service officers.)

To find a greater combination of arrogance and stupidity you'd have to go back to Marie Antoinette. But her taste in art was better.
 

 

I remember reading a tabloid on the can a year or so ago about Algore's son getting a DUI? Is this the same son that was hit by a car!?! OH THE IRONY! THE IRONY!
 

Honorable Chairman, you have sent a frisson of delight down my spine. This is perhaps even more delightful than the fact that nearly every single large meeting of MADD results in the arrest of one of the pooh-bahs with a DWI (Driving While Intoxicated--Texan). Which leads me, inexorably and as always, back to my universal Theocritus' General Unified Theory of Life--people do everything for power. MADD started with a laudable idea but once the Mad Mommas found traction, they were joined by men wanting traction, with the delightful results of at least once a year one of them getting arrested for DWI.

And speaking of unsatisfactory termagents, didn't Jill Ireland of the Feminazis have a dust-up between her husband and her girlfriend? I don't have any sympathy for Ireland though, for if she was a dyke she ought not to have married him. I've had men and women both throw themselves at me, and the women were much more suitable than the men--two are doctors--but I knew it was unfair to marry someone I didn't want to sleep with. But then--silly me--I thought that perhaps the world wasn't after all all about me.

I see I need a course in a good re-education camp. Is there a Four Seasons in Martha's Vineyard where I can watch New York liberals drink the blood of peasants? Perhaps they have had as a guest in past years, before he went to that great stew pot in the sky, Idi Amin, who in his best Julia Child persona said, "I prefer to drink da blood of de black man dan de white man because it is sweetah."

I wonder if they drink the blood of Republican virgins out of Baccarat or Stueben?

Have I crossed the boundaries of taste? Moi?
 

 

Sorry. I've been gone for a while, whipping my serf for boiling my eggs in plain water instead of widows' tears. She cried, her face turned up toward me, for she has no legs, "But Commissar! You know I cannot see since you blinded me for daring to look at your face!"

"Silence, Laploshka! Or I shall feed your tongue to my dogs. And sautee me a slice of the foie gras from that diabetic child with truffles from my private estate in Provence!"

What, honorable Punchenko, do you do about serfs any more? Four or five hundred good clouts of the knout and they want to lie down for an hour. Do you have this problem?
 

No, Noble Theocritus - I do not have such problems. For I take a more drastic approach... my serfs/peasants/useful-idiots believe that I am a Communist New Man with strange God like powers (Think The Island of Dr. Moreau, with Marlon Brando of course) They fear my knowledge of the Dark Side of Socialism... which of course is just me threatening to hose them down with very cold water... or as they call it "liquid magick". Yes, the "liquid magick" as they like to call it gets them everytime - especially if soap is involved, they are absolutely terrified of soap. They usually fall to the ground and quiver, thinking that the soap and very cold water will eat their flesh... ahh yes, the screaming and the horror in their little voices when they utter "liquid magick" amongst themselves, <sigh> gets to me everytime. I also like to be carried amongst my villagers in a solid-gold liter while donning my godly garbs of self-righteousness, altruism, and a few shiny medals I was awarded in the Glorious Soviet Union, all the while wearing white make-up, gaudy sunglasses and a Sho-Gun helmet with a jade staff gilded in gold (for theatrical effect of course). Yes, that will scare the uneducated masses into submission! That and also scaring them with the idea of a "surprise visit" from Her Excellency... which scares even me.

Those who do manage to discover that I'm nothing more than an insecure greedy bureaucrat are summarily shot... or as they like to say, "put down by the boom boom stick to serve Stalin in Detroit". I have them think that Detroit is the afterlife... they're so cute, Theocritus, especially when you play with their insignificant little minds.
 

 

Honorable Chairman, I gasp in awe of your dominance of your serfs. But at this point my pride must force me to come out of yet another closet.

I tower over all in arrogance and bossiness. I am Alan Dershowitz.
 

 

The Democrates!
 

 

Dammit... stop talking about over budget Sci-Fi shows! I might go into another trance and begin writing a progressive script for such decadent gutter sludge!
 

 

Wouldn't you first have to come out of your current trance? I promise, the $oft Ca$h is all locked away in an air-tight vault... not a whiff could possibly escape to pull you out of your current torpor... Be at peace, Meowski... all is well with the world, and there are no Inconvenient Truths you need concern yourself with at present...
 

Oh, one more thing, the Ori are socal revolutionist.
 

I just received a secret transmission:

Al Gore is starting Soylent Corporation...
Soros, Google, Heinz-Kerry, and Sulzberger family are major investors...
Production of Soylent Green to begin by 2022...
By then population is expected to be scared into submission by Global Warming...
Socialist policies will bring about shortage of food...
The only authorized food source will be Soylent Green...
It will be non-polluting, non-carbon-footprint, non-trans-fat...
But it will be made of people...
Somebody tell the Exchange...
I have proof...
Soylent Green is people...

Signed: Charlton Heston




 

If Algore starts making food out of corpses then he'll have to start with himself. He looks dead. But it's a mistake to think that he's dead from the neck up--evidently he and Our Many Titted Empress are very closet (but not intimate) politically, calculating on how best to make us serfs. And this is no arch faux-commie bit.
 

Environmentally-conscious proletarians relax after a week of hard work while listening to Party-approved songs by government composers powered by the People's Solar Panel.


 

 

Comrades! A new progressive product!


 

Excellent, facilitated alcoholism without the intended weight gain!
 

 

 

Is there really a difference? Socialists, new age, sky pilots--all the same thing all the time. All coercion, all channels, all the time, to everyone.
 

 

Who's Oliver?
 

I am so attuned, perhaps paranoid (but then a successful paranoid never knows if he had to be) that I believe that people who thrust themselves in front of a camera are trying to control you. They want your attention, and your time, taking part of your life for them. If they are merely Hollywood trash, then the answer is simple: switch the channel or turn it off. A soap-box orator you can rush past. But--and here's the crucial difference--the people to look out for are the ones who demand your attention, and it is just that, and try for a coercive way to do it.

Rand is right, yet again. Something on the lines of, "When someone comes to you and tells you to follow your mind and your reason, you scream your fool heads off, but when someone tells you to renounce, renounce, renounce, you follow him."

It is this passivity which is the only thing that really makes me despair. It can be weakness of mind, for there are many such. (And which I do not understand; Catherine the Great said it was no use for one of strong mind to advise one of weak mind for the weak-minded one cannot understand it, and she was right.)

Also this passivity can be cowardice. But the one that I deep down inside, in the dark of night, that I truly fear, is my gathering suspicion that the left is composed of really nasty self-hating people who are looking to find someone mean enough to act out their self-hatred on the world. This explains their lust for coercion, even if it affects them.

And we make much mock fun at the Cube of our dachas and, in my case, multi-colored towels for Direktor Irena, and people like Algore certainly qualify for that, but how stupid are people to think that the pie is of infinite size?

I really think that there are a great many people who are spiritual masochists, and who are looking for a master. To salve their self-hatred. To punish them for their very existence. Rand(ian) again. Notice the meanness of the left--the gathered shoulders, the heads pulled in like a vulture's. The lowered brows. The entire body language. Look at David Corn. Alan Colmes before his PR lessons.

I'll make you a bet. Watch a news program with the sound off, and you have to come in after the crawl has identified the provenance of the guests. You can tell the leftist by the hateful eyes. I can.
 

 

You might wake up some mornin'
To the sound of something moving past your window in the wind
And if you're quick enough to rise
You'll catch a fleeting glimpse of someone's fading shadow
Out on the new horizon
You may see the floating motion of a distant pair of wings
And if the sleep has left your ears
You might hear footsteps running through an open meadow

Don't be concerned, it will not harm you
It's only me pursuing somethin' I'm not sure of
Across my dreams with nets of wonder
I chase the bright elusive butterfly of love

You might have heard my footsteps
Echo softly in the distance through the canyons of your mind
I might have even called your name
As I ran searching after something to believe in
You might have seen me runnin'
Through the long-abandoned ruins of the dreams you left behind
If you remember something there
That glided past you followed close by heavy breathin'

Don't be concerned, it will not harm you
It's only me pursuing somethin' I'm not sure of
Across my dreams with nets of wonder
I chase the bright elusive butterfly of love

[Instrumental Interlude]

Across my dreams with nets of wonder
I chase the bright elusive butterfly of love


Bob Lind
 

 

 

The Party and Politburo's favorite composer has always been Tchaikovsky. His Swan Lake used to be played nation-wide when a significant Party leader died. Both sad and optimistic, on many levels. Please adjust your musical tastes accordingly.

Andew Lloyd Kulak Monster didn't write the decadent bourgeois musical Hair. Hair was written by James Rado and Gerome Ragni (book and lyrics), and Galt MacDermot (music). http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hair_%28musical%29

I think Andew's first musical was "J.C. Superstar," an equally decadent reactionary propaganda of the opiate for the masses, as it was described to us by our teacher in school.
 

When The Many Titted One is crowned Empress, instead of "Hail to the Chief" we'll have "The Nutcracker."
 

 

Comrade Meteorologist Heidi Cullen of Weather.com agrees...

"If a meteorologist has an AMS Seal of Approval, which is used to confer legitimacy to TV meteorologists, then meteorologists have a responsibility to truly educate themselves on the science of global warming, If a meteorologist can't speak to the fundamental science of climate change, then maybe the AMS shouldn't give them a seal of approval".

Cullen failed to mention her proposed Meteorologist Re-educated Camp...
 

... Or her proposed new AMS motto:

The Sky Is Falling!
 

Dear Al,

Thanks so much for your Q&A Column. Since I am novice in computer use and getting around on the internets (ooops, sorry about that !!), I faithfully follow your very, very much appreciated expert technical advice regarding computer parts… and all that other stuff about these little magic boxes.

Brother Al, I have a question about these “spy wares.” How many of them do you think are out there on the internets (Darn !!), and do you have any advice or solid evidence that these spies may be the U.S. government?

Al, the thing is… I use my computer as a voice of political dissent against the current occupants of the White House, and often stress my opinion that they all should be strung up to the tallest trees on the front lawn. At times, I'm pretty (oxymoron) vociferous about that and few other things, such as Bush's smirks and Cheney's sneers. And they apparently tell a lot of lies. That's very troubling. I believe they really do have spy wares out there on the internets (don't remind me !!), and I have the uncanny feeling they are watching me.

Al, another thing… I have read reports that half the honeybees in the U.S. (and elsewhere) have disappeared. Aren't the honeybees crucial to the environment and the production of our food supply? What or who is killing off the honeybees?

Please advise a.s.a.p.

Troubled,
Sister Blue Bell

=================


Dear Sister Blue Bell,

Thank you for your kind letter and for your important queries, which I will answer in two parts.

1. Spy ware: Well, uh… hehehe… I believe you may have the wrong idea about the terminology and use of “spy ware.” hahaha. Although, I must say that, indeed (wink), there may be spies lurking on the internets (Damn !! He has me saying it !!). Well, I have this to say about government spies on the internets…

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2. Disappearing Honey Bees: I am quite disturbed and concerned about this subject. It is my belief that…..

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Sister Blue Bell, I hope my comments on both these subjects of great importance will be of help. It's always a pleasure to hear from concerned folks like you. Keep smiling and keep up the good work !!

Your Brother, Al
 

In Boston, protesters against the Global Warming got covered with snow on March 18. A clear indication something is wrong with the climate!



The picture has disappeared from the Boston Globe, but .

Capitalist pig Tim Blair attempts sarcasm: .

Just wait till summer, capitalist pigs! We'll make every day a Global Warming day! Wait and see.
 

Traitors all!

Why is the New York Times turning against Gore? Is it because they saw the truth - or they simply can't enjoy the rest of the day unless they betray at least someone before breakfast?

Whose Ox Is Gored?
The media discover the former vice president's environmental exaggerations and hypocrisy.

http://www.opinionjournal.com/diary/?id=110009804
 

[Darth Vader Voice] NOOOOO!!! [Darth Vader Voice/] It cannot be! How could they turn against the one who invented the internet which has made them so prosperous? Why would they turn on the one who supports the cause that all of their artikles are based on? HOW!
 

By pure chance I discovered that the trailer for Inconvenient Truth fits perfectly with "Play that Funky Music Whiteboy". Try it. It's like Pink Floyd and that Dorothy movie:


(this is the best clip of PTFMWB I could find. try running the two at the same time. eerie)

 

The greatest threat of Goreble Warming is Fat Guys in Tank Tops and Fat Women in Shorts and Mid Drift Tops.

Heil Hildo!
 

 

Comrades, something is fermenting here in my brain jar. On the main page there is a quote attributed to the Gospel of Refomed Latter Day Climatologists, the "Goremons." Are we in fact creating a new opiate of the people to replace the older opiates? If so, what other new faiths are there out there? Beliefs based entirely on faith and defying logic and empirical test?

I can see one without looking too closely, a faith called Trutheranism, practiced by Trutherans. Trutheran doctrine is based on the esoteric knowledge that the 9/11 "attacks" were in fact staged by that great agent of evil, George Bush and his minions. This is supported by the Gospel of Saint Michael (otherwise known as "Farenheit 9/11"), The Revelations of Saint Rosie the Bovine, and the Various New Testimonies of The Wise Men of Holy Wood like Charlie Sheen. It has its Holy Orders, such as The Sisters of Our Lady of the Inarticulate Misconception, founded by Saint Sheehan.

So. We have Goremons and Trutherans. Has anyone noticed any other new religions blossoming out there? Anyone have anything to add to the theology of the Goremons or Trutherans? Perhaps, Comrade Red Square, this might warrant a new thread of discussi...er...Revelation?
 

Some further musings...

The Trutherans are of course a Protest-ant sect, as are their closely related denomination, the Boobtists. The core belief of Boobtism seems to be a faith that exposing a sagging pair of leathery dugs in public places can ward off the evil eye (and all other eyes, for that matter) and force the Great Mother Spirit to enter the hearts and minds of non-Boobtists and enlighten them as to the utter evil of the Rethuglican heretics who lay awake at night trying to figure out where the largest concentration of children are so they can bomb them the next day.