People's Official Rand Paul Denouncement Thread

User avatar

Welcome to the People’s Official Rand Paul Denouncement Thread™, where comrades are cordially invited to smear, trash, bash, revile, excoriate, and otherwise assassinate the character of GOP Presidential Candidate Rand Paul. We want you to have fun, and all we ask is that you do not say anything nice about him, mainly because there is nothing nice to say.

Bad. Dangerous. Evil. Stupid. Liar. Bloodthirsty. Vile. Hypocrite. Villain. Scum. Monster. Traitor. Tyrant.

Just totally, utterly, absolutely WRONG!

I refer, of course, to Rand Paul, who wants to steal the 2016 election. I hate Rand Paul, and you should, too. Everyone should hate him.

Rand Paul is the worst thing that could ever happen to the whole universe since George W. Bush. And that’s saying something, since I never dreamed anyone could ever be worse than Bush.

Rand Paul will destroy society, civilization, and all of humanity forever. George W. Bush only destroyed everything till the end of time. But Rand Paul will take the mass destruction into infinity and beyond, and laugh the whole time he’s doing it.

Mass starvation, homelessness, joblessness, death and disease will be everywhere. Everyone will be thrown out of their homes and onto the streets, forced to take shelter in cardboard “Paulvilles.”

Rand Paul is also guilty of treason because he’s one of the 47 Republicans who signed that sick, seditious letter to Iran. This already disqualifies him from the presidency. If Iran gets a nuclear weapon and uses it, you can blame Rand Paul—unless, of course, they drop it on Israel, in which case—well, you can still blame Rand Paul. No one should give Rand Paul credit for anything.

Rand Paul hates women, which should come as no surprise since he hates everyone and everything except his own lust for power. He bullies women reporters simply because he hates them, and why wouldn’t he? They’re women, and he’s nothing but a woman-hating woman hater. Anyone who hates women and bullies because he hates them is totally unfit for the presidency.

Rand Paul hates women so much that he thinks they should be forced to get pregnant and forbidden to have abortions. He hates women so much he wants to force them to have babies because he hates them, too, so much that he wants to see the babies suffer for being unwanted. He hates women’s babies so much he wants to see them starve and die, because they come out of women and Rand Paul hates women.

Rand Paul hates women so much that when his website published all those “Show Your Support” profile pix—you know, images that say, “Impotent Old White Men for Rand Paul,” “Fat Cat Bankers for Rand Paul,” “Corporate Jet Owners for Rand Paul” and “Puppy Kickers for Rand Paul”—every group you can think of that might actually vote for this woman hating woman hater—he left off one very particular group of people: Women! There is no such thing as Women for Rand Paul. He knows it and doesn’t care and why should he? He hates them!

Why, the only reason Rand Paul is running for president is to stop Hillary, and why? Yep, you guessed it—because she’s a woman. And Rand Paul hates women. Hates them, hates them, HATES THEM!

Rand Paul has a real problem with women.

If Rand Paul is allowed to get away with stealing the Presidency from Hillary or Elizabeth Warren, rest assured he will proclaim himself dictator, and say stupid hateful things—like all women must die because they wouldn’t vote for him, and why wouldn’t they vote for him? Because he hates them. HATES THEM!

All of us, especially women, will be living in fear of our lives because of Rand Paul’s misogynistic, bloodthirsty tyranny.

Furthermore, Rand Paul is known as a “Tea Party darling.” Well, there’s nothing darling, adorable, or cute about him. Look up “Tea Party darling” in your thesaurus, and these are the words you’ll see: Terrorist. Hostage-taker. Bomb-thrower. Fearmonger. Hatemonger. Extortionist. And, of course, Woman Hater. Is that who you want to see in the White House? Someone who pals around with terrorists?

That’s all I have to say for now. Oh wait, one more thing...Rand Paul is just like Hitler!

Coming soon - The People's Official Marco Rubio Denouncement Thread™! Also, keep an eye out for "Jeb Bush: Do I Really Have to Say Anything More?"



User avatar
Comrades that deserve the plus good emotions of my heart, I stand in solidarity with Commissarka Pinkie, as should we all in lockstep MOVE ON to the point of actively being activists for the activity of not allowing our double plus good inevitable candidate form being over shadowed by this plus ungood Rethugagain usurper of the justice that will be the election of a leader that will bring us all to the glory of Next Tuesday, her majestic Clinton excellency, Lady of distention, Entitled Hillary Clinton. It is plus apparent that the double plus nasty Rethugagains do not know that it is HER time. SHE is the second savior of the USSA. They are holding up the whole inevitable process of her well deserved and earned position as the first madame president. If this unsmart election process could just be skipped we could achieve so much in the march to equality for all expect those that are so superior and are plus much equaler that others.


I am once again concerned for what we are headed towards.
As we know the inevitable, deserving, entitled progressive demon-krat candidate Clinton II, The Hillary, is the lone and selected individual to be the next president.
I look now and see that once again there is a whole selection of the other side of the same coin.

As I see this we have the demon-krat inevitable choice that the low information, socialist, progressive, radical, disenfranchised youth, illegal, ji had ist and useful idiot 40%+ that will vote for this do nothing, lying, criminal.
While on the other side we have 40%+ being shared between at least 4-7 options (one being a demon-krat in republican clothing, hint = plant that is not a tree but a ....).
The ~ 20% is either not "appearing in this film" or will also be undecided.

This makes the demon-krats the winner, "COBRA!" and the "Joes" with vipers chasing them back to their base.




User avatar
He's worse than Hitler. He's just like George W Bush who killed 1.3 billion Iraqis, stole their oil, and made himself president for life.



User avatar
Rand Paul will deny comrades the most cherished and fundamental human right. The right for others to pay for abortions! Without That Guaranteed freedom, there is no freedom!



User avatar
Rand Paul wants to take away our shovels.




Rand Paul not only HATES women - he BEATS women!!! Just take a look at his wife who's wearing Harry Reid™ sunglasses to cover up her empty eye sockets and butchered flesh.


It's disgusting to think of the lamp shades he's probably made from the skin of his former female patients. And, the nerve that he has to call himself a doctor. Rand Paul = The Beast of Bowling Green




User avatar
Rand hates science so much that he will outlaw vaccinations that protect women from "micro-aggressions."



User avatar
Rand Paul wants to force pregnant women to bring their seven pound unborn everyday-Americans into the pre-utopian world where barbarian conservatives are still allowed to roam the earth freely, clinging to their guns and religion while speaking of individual liberty and (shudder) self-reliance.




User avatar
Rand Paul? He is an idiot, a naively confident one at that. Amidst the almighty bright star of Hillary, Obama, and The Party, Rand is merely an almost dead flashlight with an old bulb. Also, what kind of a name is Rand? Seriously. Would you want a man with a name like Rand running your country? Rand sounds like a calculator function, like the name of some defunct electrical equipment manufacturer. However, the latter holds a similarity with Rand Paul, as Rand's campaign is essentially defunct when compared to the campaign of The Party, and Rand, Cruz and all the rest shall surely be defeated by the Party. Do not worry dear Comrades, The almighty Party and it's reign over the State will never end, it's just that election time is like the gaps between railroad tracks, you can feel the bump, but just a little, and you're still on the track afterwards. All you must do is sleepily relax in the soft, warm, safe, loving care of the State, and let dear Motherland do her thing.

Armenian Radio. wrote:Rand hates science so much that he will outlaw vaccinations that protect women from "micro-aggressions."

Armenian Radio, long-time listener, first time writer. I have a question. In a People's Race between the vile Ted Cruz and the terrible Rand Paul, which one would get to the finish line first? Also, what would be the person's punishment for getting there first? I know that it's always been tarring, fathering, and being spun in a dryer with nails and rocks for 48 hours, but the Committee of Success Nullification has undergone a leadership change and the new leadership has been changing things a bit.



User avatar
Margaret wrote:His mama wears army boots!
On all four of her paws!




User avatar
We have our first writer for today. This is comrade "shtey...Stierlitz" in the USSA. thank you for calling. your question is...:
Q: In a People's Race between Ted Cruz and Rand Paul, which one would get to the finish line first?
A: It's a trick question, comrades. In a Peoples Race, everyone begins at the finish line and runs backwards. The goal is to reach the Horizon, which keeps getting farther away with every step. That way, there are no Winners and everyone is equally sad, the way it should be.
Only Ted Cruz or Rand Paul are so selfish that they would think of doing better than others. If so, there are many appropriate punitive measures, like Death by one million hashtags, or shovel decapitation.
But my personal favorite is overexposure to the peoples navy gallery.